Oh, alright, facebook, you win. I will write a little blurby up at the top so that you don’t squish all the haiku together in my newsfeed and ruin all the meager jokes.
I will admit, I cheat just a tiny wee bit on the syllable counts of two lines. But if that bothers you, then hold that line in your hands, and lo, where there was once eight syllables, there will be seven. Okay, fine, the real solution is to just mush words together to make one syllable instead of two, or, even better, forget I said anything and live happily with my little ‘fauxku’. But hey, if the magical hands thing actually happens, then remember me when someone writes a religious text about you someday.
Oh greasy Jesus,
Let your good-haired disciples
Teach you of shampoo.
Wildly pumping arms
And strange hopscotch-esque dance moves
Matrix-like high priests
And guards who look like Daleks:
A temple for nerds.
Just like Lazarus,
90s clip art rises from death
to be projections.
To be really moved by this show
Must you be Christian?