Baby Fish Mouth

26 Jul

I know that Hollywood is rife with surgery of all stripes, some better than others. Face lifts, eyebrow lifts, boobs galore, ‘back scoops’ (looking at you, creature-that-used-to-be-recognizably Heidi Montag); it’s an industry that is dependent on looks, so it makes sense that there would be little… enhancements… all over the place. And one of my very least favorite of these enhancements has always been lip fillers.

Yes, the lovely  so-called ‘trout pout’.

Trout.

Trout Pout.

There tends to be two immediately noticeable variations – the first is people who have or had big lips, and have filled them – those, like the unfortunate Lisa Rinna above, tend to yield the unfortunate ‘Down pillow after if accidentally went through the dryer’ lumpitude. The second, like Meg Ryan below (oh Meg Ryan! How adorable and charming you are! Stop with the fillers!!), seems to occur with someone who has naturally thin lips, and therefore not much actual lip skin to work with.

Before and after.

This one is almost immediately identifiable because of it’s bizarro tendency to have someone’s lip swell in the skin above it, like a little awning, or like they have cotton in their gums, instead of forming a subtle little ski jump of flesh, as in normal, unhelped lips.  It almost never looks good or better or even normal, and there’s really only one actress I can think of who has potentially benefited from it, or at least has had such good work that it goes mostly unnoticed (I will not say her name, but let’s just say it rhymes with ‘Shiera Shmightley’, who went from being an adorable tomboy with no upper lip in ‘Bend it Like Beckham’ to having one of the best upper lips in the business).

Then

Now! (well, now-ish).

Most of the time, though, the massive press machine that happens on the West Coast comes in with airbrushes at the ready, so that in any press shots any little unsightly lumpy bumpies can smooth out and go away, and any extra enhancements will seem like they came from DNA, not a DR.

Which is why I was surprised to find in my inbox a screening invite featuring this poster:

I don’t really know much about this movie, and that’s still true after looking at the poster, because instead of noticing things like the fact that it starts Panks from the BBC ‘Little Dorrit’,  and I guess it’s a thriller of some sort – all I thought was AHHHHHHHHHHHTROUTPOUTTROUTPOUTTROUTPOUT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I mean, for real, studio releasing this movie. Gemma Arterton is young and beautiful, and few enough people saw ‘Prince of Persia’ that most people are probably still willing to pay money to see movie’s she’s in. But did you really have to choose the angle that MOST highlighted how unnaturally puffed her top lip is there, how it does exactly that cotton-stuffed gum thing? It even looks like it sticks out a few centimeters over the bottom lip, like it’s swollen – why oh why would you ever spotlight that right at the top there?

Now, I’m not saying that she definitely has fillers here – I certainly wasn’t at the surgeon’s with her, and frankly I don’t care too much either way. But man, that poster sure makes it look unnatural, and that’s my point – it’s pretty hard to take a photo of Gemma Arterton where she doesn’t look just straight-up gorgeous, so why on earth choose a photo with such a bothersome distraction?

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2 Responses to “Baby Fish Mouth”

  1. Crone July 27, 2010 at 12:26 am #

    I love how the ad at the bottom is for Lip filler. ps. i like keira with fishlips. She should have married orlando bloom and then run off with johnny depp. just fyi.

  2. bloggledygook July 27, 2010 at 8:41 am #

    I like her with the lips too!! I don’t know why it works so well on her and not on others. And oh no!! I was growing fond of my ‘Shark Week’ ads. Sigh.

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