Dear Topshop –
Look, I like you. I like your fancy London pedigree, I like that you make high fashion more accessible to the masses, and I like that a lot of the stuff in your stores are risky and interesting (and yes, it was me who bought that hundred-stranded necklace in all three available colors, guilty as charged!). But listen, Topshop, there’s a degree for everything. And you’re really pushing it with this little number:
You see, Topshop, if I wanted to look like I was on a walk of shame after a night of questionable decisions made at a truck stop, I can think of many ways to do so without shelling out $135 for the privilege (mostly, by going to a truck stop and making questionable decisions, which would be free except for the cost of my dignity!). So why don’t you guys just stick to the whole ‘cute dresses that Kate Moss wears’ thing and leave the ‘it already comes so dirty looking you’ll be tempted to burn it as soon as you get home!’ to the thrift store reject piles.